"spewing hate"

"i want" you, to realise your squeaky-cleanness and power (to show love and money) may have combined to make james , who is not squeaky=clean, nor has ample money enough of his own, trade on you, getting trapped in a web of deception that only you fully fail to accept. when you realise and accept this [possibility , both of you may attain a better understanding, and j. will lose the need to "control" his position at all times. i have no reason to doubt that both of you are , "underneath" , normally decent people, led astray by circumstances beyond your control , from birth.

i was involved in this by j. and j.' doctor (with j. in the room), and have investigated to find the truth. i am also motivated by my desire to see the world clean up, for the present and future of (it) all. outside investigators seldom diagnose what the insiders themselves believe. i make no claim to be squeaky-clean myself, but my commitment is not to be doubted.

i do not imagine for one moment that L. is perfect , but i naturally have her welfare at heart...along with that of everyone else. i may of course be mistaken, but my diagnosis would have to be taken seriously (not indignantly brushed aside) before anyone could know. i offer it as a considered help to those concerned, and the world at large.

i also , myself, take seriously my claims to be the pivot around which the world will turn.... and i have on occasion hoped marianne might investigate these , and thus help them be proved right or wrong. so long as they are ignored, the reluctance of the world to change may reasonably be suspected of being the obstacle to the salvation of the species. on the other hand, as you know, i regard every item as perfectly contributory , and the solution as bound to happen at the perfect moment, revealing all that went before as awesomly necessary.

i ask .above all, for l.'s forgiveness in following up the summons in the way seeming best to me....what else can one do?

i sincerely wish the best for everyone as ever